Wives: a blessing not a burden

Too often I hear from Christian wives that they feel like a burden to their husbands. They don’t feel like they’re contributing. They aren’t sure what difference they make. They don’t see how being a wife is a blessing to their husband.

I’ve talked before about how God created Eve for Adam and it stands to reason we, too, were created by an all-knowing Creator for our spouse. We are meant to be a helpmate to him.

Today, we’re going to talk about what it looks like to be a blessing not a burden to our husband.

The purpose of marriage

First and foremost, you must change your mindset around being a wife. Modern society is going to tell you that being a wife is nothing spectacular. In fact, it says being a wife hinders your progress. It hinders success. As Christians, we know this simply is not true. We know that marriage is a reflection of the relationship with Jesus (Ephesians 5:31-32). Paul is really clear about the purpose of marriage.
Our marriage is designed to be a mirror of how the Church and Jesus become one. They are singular in purpose and that purpose is to glorify God. If you’re walking in that purpose and encouraging each other to grow with their personal relationship with God, how can you be a burden?

The truth is, you cannot be a burden walking in that purpose. 

The first time in the Bible God says something is not good is when He refers to Adam’s predicament of being alone. That was intentional.

God knew He would create Eve. However, God lets us know everything is good expect for the idea that man be alone (Genesis 2:18).

God then says He will make a helper suitable for Adam.

Sister, it is time you apply that to your marriage.

It is not good for your husband to be alone. God created you to help him in his walk with the Lord. He created you so the two of you together can be a reflection of Jesus and the Church. He formed your marriage to be an example to others.

You didn’t meet your husband by mistake.

God knew this would happen and created you exactly for him. He knew you both needed each other to make it through this world. Let’s face it, it’s nuts out here. We may be in the world but we are not of the world.

Let’s talk about the creation of Eve for a nanosecond here and how it relates to our role as a wife.

There’s a lot of worldly people and let’s be honest, Christians, in arms about the verse discussing the hierarchy of marriage and the word submissive is “dirty.”

That’s because the world made it sound awful.

Our own creation

If we look at how Eve was created, we’ll see that God did not place her above or below Adam.

Eve was made from the rib of Adam, not his feet, his head or any other part of the body. The rib signifies that Eve is beside Adam. She is there to walk alongside him. She is not below him nor is she above him.

In Ephesians 5 we learn that wives are the VP in their marriage and their husband is the President. That doesn’t make us less then. In fact, God says you should be equally yoked with your spouse (2 Corinthians 6:14).

Are you acting like you’re equally yoked and walking alongside your husband? Or are you not holding up your end of the bargain?

Are you constantly complaining about home responsibilities and children? Are you encouraging him to be the leader he is called to be?

The truth is we are to honor God with our offerings (Romans 12:1). That includes how we serve our spouse. In Romans we learn that we need to honor God in everything we do.

If we’re not fulfilling our role as the wife God called us to be, are we honoring God?

Now, I’m not saying I’m perfect at this. We can’t be.

are you encoring your husband as a blessing or acting like a burden as the wife
We aren’t Jesus
But I can try my hardest to honor God by honoring and sacrificing for my husband. If you feel like a burden to your husband, ask yourself if you’ve been honoring him and sacrificing for him or is he the only one making the sacrifices?
I ask you to take an honest look at how you show up in your marriage.
I know when I don’t show up the way God asks of me, it causes unnecessary stress on my marriage. When I fail to hold up my part, my husband has unnecessary stress and it reflects in all areas of our life.
As the wife and homemaker, it’s my job to ensure our home is a peaceful place where love can flourish and where we can grow in faith together.
As a Christian wife, we have a choice to make.

Will we be a burden or a blessing?

If you’re ready to really embrace what it means to be the wife God called you to be, join us in the Prudent Homemaker. It’s a monthly community where there’s trainings, meetings and a community of Christian women growing in their walk with God so they can show up better for their family.

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  1. I am still too young to become wife. But I think it’s every women’s dream to become wife. Isn’t it? It’s a beautiful thing. I hope I can enjoy it soon.

    1. One would hope all women desire to be a wife but unfortunately the world paints a different narrative. I am so thankful you know being a wife is a priority for you someday.

  2. I love all of your scripture references. Thank you for sharing your heart! Being a wife is a pure joy of mine ?

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